Jesus was clear, marriage is forever

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Msgr. Matthew Mitas

Q. What is the Catholic Church's teaching on divorce? 

We can only teach what the Lord Himself taught and that is precisely what we do. Jesus condemned divorce in the strongest language. Let's take a closer look.

The Lord forbade divorce four times in the Gospels (Matthew 5:31f & 19:3-9, Mark 10:2-12, and Luke 16:18). "Let no man separate what God has joined," Jesus thundered. By so declaring, He affirmed that no human has the authority to dissolve a validly conceived, sacramental marriage bond. He further proclaimed that anyone who tried to dissolve it and remarry committed adultery.

The message is clear: This teaching is from the Lord and it can never change. And why would we want to change it? It's a standard that's hard to meet, true, but it's still a standard, and what situation has ever been improved by lowering the standard?

Based on what St. Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 7:10, the Church has always made the distinction between divorce and separation. Unhappily, it is sometimes necessary, as in cases involving violence or abuse, that the couple must live apart. This is separation and, when the reasons are compelling, it is legitimate. Though separated, the spouses are still husband and wife and are obliged to be faithful to one another. In the United States, it is sometimes necessary because of legalities to obtain a secular divorce in order to affect the separation, but even then, the Lord's dictum still holds: They are still husband and wife, the state having no power to sunder what God has joined.

Marriage, being a sacrament like the Eucharist, is as holy as the Eucharist. Anyone who causes the break-up of a marriage, therefore, has done great evil. It often happens, however, that one of the spouses sacrifices heroically to keep the marriage together but is victimized by the other's conjugal truancy. Unjustly abandoned, that spouse incurs no sin, but even in that case, may not remarry, for the lifelong vows still apply.

Keep in mind that being legally divorced is in itself not a sin, but a secular state and does not preclude Catholics from receiving the sacraments. Indeed, divorced Catholics who have not remarried are in good standing with the Church and, like all Catholics, should actively participate in the Catholic faith. The Church welcomes all to fully participate in the faith.

And even those who are in an invalid second marriage are encouraged to take part in the life in the Church as far as they are able, to raise their children as good Catholics and cultivate a spirit of penance so as to implore God's grace (No. 1651).

The Church also provides guidance on the annulment process. Annulment is the formal declaration that the sacramental bond did not exist. It is not divorce, so those whose marriages are annulled may remarry.

Msgr. Mitas is pastor of Immaculate Conception Parish in Union and dean of the Washington Deanery. Send questions for a priest to: St. Louis Review, 20 Archbishop May Drive, St. Louis, MO 63119 or to letters@stlouis review.com