Faith is fortifying this house, new dweller and all

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Jack Ambrose Phillips

Teak Phillips

This year brought a good Thanksgiving. While most American families were gathering for big feasts, my wife Ann and I were holding our own feast with doctors and nurses.

Jack Ambrose Phillips was born at 11:08 a.m. Our "little turkey," as Ann's doctor quipped, came out at 7 pounds 5 ounces. He is our first child and without a doubt a little miracle.

Our journey to parenthood was long but filled with faith. It wasn't always easy to listen to God or understand what He was saying. There were times it was easier to ignore His call and instead focus on what we wanted.

When we began to understand what it means to give up our lives — to die of ourselves — His call became more clear and easier to hear. "He must increase; I must decrease" (John 3:30).

We focused on Church-approved natural family planning and lovingly discussed fertility cycles, fears and dreams. We opened our doors to Christ and to building our domestic church.

Getting pregnant was neither planned nor unplanned — it was simply in the hands of God. Sure, we knew fertility times based on the Creighton model we'd been following but we were more interested in being open to love and life, to God's intention for our marriage.

Dying of ourselves didn't cramp our style. It improved it. It provided comfort.

When it was clear that God had chosen us to be parents, our faith and love for each other grew greater than we could have imagined. Our marriage had always been strong, but the knowledge that we'd soon be sharing our love and lives with a child was inspiring.

And perhaps a little frightening.

Throughout pregnancy, our baby was introduced to our domestic church. Each night Ann read Scripture aloud and we prayed for a healthy pregnancy. We asked God to comfort women in crisis pregnancies or who did not have the same means and support as Ann. The baby heard our prayers, our laughter and our love — and the boisterous barks of our dog, Cowboy.

Each night we asked God for the wisdom and strength to be good parents who will teach our son to learn to love God, that we would have the courage to give up our own desires to focus on God's will and the baby's needs.

Ann's labor — a process men simply cannot comprehend — was comforted by faith. When we arrived at St. Anthony's Medical Center in south St. Louis County in the wee hours of the morning, the staff greeted us with joy — this was indeed going to be a day of giving thanks.

There was no question that St. Anthony's is grounded in the Catholic faith. "Catholic" is the fourth word in its mission statement, printed right there on the huge water mug Ann sipped from for hours. A crucifix provided a crucial focus point for her during contractions. A nurse anesthetist prayed with us before giving Ann epidural analgesia. A nurse's aid delayed taking vital signs while we prayed the rosary. The postpartum and nursery nurses were loving, caring and understanding. An extraordinary minister of Holy Communion brought us the Blessed Sacrament.

There was not a moment when we did not feel Christ's presence as we welcomed new life.

In his explanation of Psalm 118 — a hymn of thanksgiving — St. Ambrose of Milan, for whom our son is named, said "faith is the door of the soul, and if it is strong then it fortifies the whole house."

Indeed, opening the door to Christ has fortified our house, even though it just got a little more crowded.

Phillips is the director of publications for the Archdiocese of St. Louis. He, his wife and son are members of St. Ambrose Parish on The Hill. He can be reached at editor@stlouisreview.com.